The information below was published by the Funeral Services Association of B.C. and is used with permission.

 

Why have a funeral? What is the point?

 

As difficult as it can be to discuss death, grief and funerals, it is ultimately more difficult to avoid the topic. For thousands of years, funerals have been a means of expressing our beliefs, thoughts and feelings about the death of someone we love.

 

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The funeral ceremony:

 

• Helps us acknowledge that someone we love has died

 

• Allows us to say goodbye

• Helps us remember the person who died and encourages us to share those memories with others

• Offers a place for us to talk about the life and death of the person

who dies

 

• Provides a social support system for us and other friends

and family members

• Allows us to search for the meaning of life and death

• Offers continuity and hope for the living.

Whether you choose burial or cremation, the major purpose of a funeral or other form of ceremony is to recognize a particular life, and to make real the fact that the life has ended. The remembering, deciding and reflecting that takes place in the planning of the service are often an important part of the process of grief and mourning. Ultimately, this process of contemplation and discovery creates a memorable and moving funeral experience for all who attend.

We gather together to establish the significance of a life. Instead of dismissing the whole funeral process in an effort to escape the reality of death, we should work to make the funeral as meaningful and healing as possible. It is impossible to progress through grief without first facing the fact of the loss.

It is important to recognize that funerals are for the living; for those who will suffer the trauma of losing a loved one. It is through the funeral process that a number of emotional needs are met for those who grieve.

A funeral is similar to other ceremonies in our lives. Like a graduation ceremony, a wedding, a baptism, a funeral is a rite of passage by which we recognize an important event that distinguishes our lives. The funeral declares a death has occurred.